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DEVEN GREEN is an award-winning comedic chanteuse. You know her from the “Welcome To My Home” and “Welcome To My White House” parodies, portraying the satirical Betty Bowers and enjoying a high ball.   DevenGreen.com

 

Dear Deven:

I am currently dating an older gentleman that talks Shakespearean when he is around his friends. How do I tell him that it’s mortifying to me?

“Old Fashioned”

Don’t worry! You won’t be dating him for long.  He is too good for you and your petty judgments.

 

Dear Deven:

I live with a “handyman” (my husband) who will watch a home repair program then think he can do it himself! It costs me more to fix it later. How do I get him to change the channel?

“Screwdriver”

I say, “put him to work!” Be a project manager and use his services for smaller more realistic jobs to do around the house/yard. Give him credit for trying.

 

Dear Deven:

I get a “free night” once a month outside the parameters of my relationship. Can you help me out?

“Hot Toddy”

1) I’m not a hook up site. 2) I’ll bet there is an online app for this type of activity. 3) Make sure your partner knows the nature of your relationship.

 

Dear Deven:

I had taken myself off the market last year for personal growth and found that it was more frustrating than anything else. Totally pointless.  What is the best way to make up for lost time?

“Absinthe”

I hope you learned that if something doesn’t feel right you need to change it pronto. Realistically you can never make up for lost time, you can only double up on your efforts moving forward.

 

Dear Deven:

I’ve recently moved from Atlanta to NY for work. I’m very enthusiastic about how much I love my home city but someone ends up taking offense.  How can I stop these “my city is better” comparison arguments?

“Manhattan”

You are homesick, honey. Atlanta is everything to you but there is something in your delivery that is making others defensive.  Find the beauty where you have to be until you can rest where you wish.

 

Dear Deven:

I’m in a long-distance love affair but I hate flying. Are we doomed?

“B-52

I’m sure you phone, text, and video chat, but the real test is the day-to-day experience.  It seems very fulfilling for what you need right now emotionally, but, if you want more you will ultimately end up drifting apart.

 

Dear Deven:

I’m a morning person. He is a night person. Will it ever work out?

“Tequila Sunrise”

Agree that you are both good for a nooner and everything will be just fine.

 

Dear Friends: I do not offer advice, only my excellent experience.  DevenGreen@gmail.com

Image: Reed Davis Photography

MUA: Joseph Adivari Hair: Miles Jeffries

Dress: Debakalis by John Sakalis / Eddie DeBarr

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